Monday, February 9, 2009

This month marks one year of me getting pregnant.
Its so hard to look back at the months before that.
I was so sad, I was so lonely, I didn't know who I was or where I was headed.
Something that seemed like a disaster,
has somehow helped me find who I am.
In the last year so many things have changed.
So many lives have been touched.
From a crisis pregnancy.
Its a scary thought when I sit back and think about where I was headed,
If this Angel wasnt sent to me.
I automatically knew my choice the day I found out I was pregnant.
It wasnt even something I questioned.
I was scared to death.
People that dont know me so well want to think that maybe my family had influence in my choice.
No they didnt.
Who was I to say " You dont deserve what I had. Parents that planned for you. A family that has be anxiously waiting for you"
This month has been and probably will be one of the most changing for me.
My Angel turns 3 months old today.
Crazy how long ago that was, but just how tender the scars still are.
I am doing my first outreach to a high school of girls on 2/12.
I'm nervous, excited & anxious to be able to share my story with them and be a part of something amazing.
I am going for my very first visit to Josh & Lizzy.
Man I cant wait to hold that girl and tell her I love her from my own mouth.
To kiss her little face & remind her that I miss her every single breath that I take.
To breath in her beautiful baby smell because It feels like its been forever since i held her in my arms.
I thank my heavenly father every single day for sharing Mara with me.
For letting her come into my life.
She alone has saved me.

2 comments:

Heather said...

Kat- you are an amazing example to me. I know our choices werent easy but Christ Said "i never said it would be, but it would be worth it" and it truely has. I am so happy to hear you are doing ur first out reach congrats my prayers are with you girl. I cant wait to do mine, something keeps coming up each time i want to and i think i am just getting scared. Keep your head up love ya
call me sometime

Heather said...
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